I often get asked, "What is coliving?" Recently, I was invited to a panel to discuss this very question, highlighting both the growing interest in coliving and the confusion surrounding its definition.
As interest grows, so does the variety of coliving spaces. From large urban apartment-style coliving spaces housing 200-300 people with lots of shared amenities to small rural coliving spaces with just five members, the spectrum has widened. Those who discovered coliving through large spaces may question if smaller ones qualify as coliving, and vice versa. Some media even claim the essence of coliving is having a coworking space and an ensuite bathroom, but I don’t think that’s the core of coliving.
People have different ideas about what coliving is. We hear comments like, "That's not real coliving," "There’s no community there," "It’s too organized," "It's too small to be coliving," or "It’s too big for coliving." Among all these contradictions, we realize we are not on the same page, which leads to the question, "What is actually coliving in the first place?”
So what is happening here?
With the rise in people's mobility, leading to weaker connections and loneliness, the demand for flexible accommodations where people can feel connected is increasing. The concept of the sharing economy has become more of a default mode. Sharing a flat used to be a temporary option before you could afford your own apartment or get married. But now, more people stay single and need options other than getting an apartment for themselves. Not getting married doesn’t mean we don’t need a sense of belonging. More people travel slowly while working. People seek homes on the road, where they can continue to connect and thrive.
Demand for solutions that meet the updated needs of the population has grown, leading to various new concepts and models largely under two different environmental settings—urban areas and destinations/rural. Among these new solutions, many spaces that feel they aren’t quite traditional or want to attract this changing demand seem to use the word ‘coliving’ simply because they don’t have a better word for them or because it helps them stand out. This can be convenient, but it also creates confusion.
Confusion and Frustration
Community-focused coliving spaces feel misunderstood, as some spaces that aren't even coliving use the term, giving coliving a bad reputation. During my current trip to Europe, I visited various coliving spaces and noticed this trend. I stayed at two places that called themselves "coliving" for one night each. They had workspaces and long-term stay amenities, but the WhatsApp groups were inactive, and I didn’t feel at home. If it was my first coliving experience, I might have stayed away from future coliving possibilities.
Meanwhile, some hostels did a better job without calling themselves colivings. One in Granada had frequent communication among guests, proposing activities and fostering connections. These hostels naturally attracted similar people without explicitly aiming to build a community. I met an architect from India passionate about jazz and old towns, and we had a great discussion. I know we’ll stay good friends and might meet again in the future.
So why don’t these ‘colivings’ drop their names and call themselves ‘hostels’? Or should friendly hostels start calling themselves colivings? It's hard to blame them. There will be a lot of evolution in response to changing societal needs. People use the new language of coliving to describe their spaces because the concept isn't fixed yet.
Confusion about coliving will likely continue, and more diverse living formats will emerge under its umbrella. Different types of communities will also develop, each with its unique approach. This confusion is not new.
I experienced a similar pattern in the coworking field. Original coworking spaces founded with a strong focus on community were disappointed by how WeWork changed people's perceptions. People who learned about coworking after WeWork had a different notion than those who knew before. They associated coworking with unlimited beer, fancy interiors, and occasional community events offered as a benefit.
The Definition of Coliving
So what is actually coliving? What is not coliving? What are the essentials of coliving?
Coliving is a modern form of communal living where residents share not just physical space, but also common interests, values, and intentions.
Here’s a popular definition you might find online. According to this, it’s not about family dinners, although they’re nice. It doesn’t have to be huge, as long as it has some shared space to allow people to get together. I generally agree with this definition.
If I may attempt a definition:
Coliving is a modern form of communal living with more flexibility based on a conscious choice.
Choice: Why Colivings Are Not Shared Flats
Let’s delve deeper by comparing coliving to traditional shared living arrangements. Why do we call it "coliving" instead of just "shared flats"?
Shared flats are often about sharing space primarily for economic reasons. You don’t necessarily care about who you live with and might even avoid shared spaces. If you could afford it, you'd likely prefer living alone. In shared flats, you kinda live together because you have to.
Coliving, on the other hand, is about community. People choose to live together in coliving because they see the value in being part of a community. Residents often pay more for colivings, choosing to live there intentionally for the benefits of being around others. You share in colivings, while you split in shared houses. Sharing in colivings is about a sense of community and connection.
Can They Use Other Names?
In this context, I personally prefer calling most urban colivings "social housing" since their primary value proposition is more about meeting housing needs: quality, flexible, and reasonably priced apartment options.
Colivings that allow one-night stays might be better termed "hostels with workspaces." People choose these as calmer, more affordable hostels that provide workspaces, rather than for the community aspect. This way, people can better find what they are looking for and the right community.
But let’s accept that this won’t happen. Confusion will continue. We’ll keep hearing the same questions and the same dissatisfaction.
Let’s Change the Question
So, instead of focusing on "What is actually coliving?", let’s ask something else:
"What are we looking for?"
You might have an expectation about coliving and be surprised when reality differs. Instead of focusing on the term, we need to talk more about what we are looking for, what values we want to create, and why these communities are doing what they are doing. Don’t get stuck on the term. Describe the daily life you expect and want to live, as detailed as possible.
Express your needs and values clearly. Find a community that aligns with your needs or create a living arrangement that reflects your values. Experiencing different coliving spaces can help you identify your needs, but the more you define your needs, the less likely you are to be disappointed.
For anyone who has experienced good coliving and wants to create one, the same advice applies: Instead of just calling it coliving, describe more concretely the lives people can expect and why you are doing this. Be yourself even more so that we can all find what we are looking for and create what we actually want to, in various colors. Don't get stuck on the term and what you just see. The term comes later.
How do you want to feel in a coliving?
Here’s another question. Picture it first, then see which word fits the picture best. Start from there.
As demand grows, variations will continue. More people will invest time in finding the right fit. The best strategy is to be yourself.
Thank you for reading. What are your thoughts? I’m keen to listen.